musings of mine

once upon a time (it seems soo long ago), i was called into my principal’s office, at the convent. she stared at me..goggle eyed through those huge glasses, the cross around her neck dangling i remember. she looked at me and said, ‘i am disappointed in you..you will never grow up..and it is a shame, for you can go far in life if you only took it a little more seriously…you can achieve great heights in this school if you changed your attitudes a little bit.’

 i bumped into that nun today, and turned around and ran! funny, inspite of me not being in school anymore and her not being it’s principal, how the mere sight of her can still evoke palpitations!

throughout my school life i was told that i was immature and childish. i was told to ‘grow up’..constantly! and that..was the last thing i did! and i loved it! my excuse was, being childish was a part of being me and i wasn’t going to change cos someone else wanted me to! i’d change when i wanted to! now that i think about it, it was crappy excuse. and i was really being stubborn. it was another reason to reject authority…and throw sand in the eyes of my wonderful teachers! (i use too many exclamation marks!)

this year hasn’t really been conducive to the childish shannon. it hasn’t helped…at all. i’ve been looked upto more than once, and by more than one person. i’ve had to make decisions. go to the bank, to the doctor all by myself…and those are strictly ‘things-to-do-with -another-preferably-older-person’ in my book. and yes, i know what you’re thinking…my! what a big baby! sigh! well rest assured, this baby’s no longer one anymore. and im pouting right now cos i really don’t like it.

i’m 20, and it just hit me; growing up really sucks! maturing is even worse! dealing with the problems and choices life’s giving me right now…well…i’m kind of not liking them..so yeah…growing up really really really sucks!

the adjective: a word that expresses an attribute of something

recently i was asked to describe myself in one word. i couldn’t.

the other night i couldn’t sleep. it was too fucking hot. and somehow the whole ‘describe yourself in one adjective’ kinda came into my head and i listed adjectives which i’d use to describe myself. somehow it seemed something interesting to blog about..

the list’s kinda long… and at times completely contradictory..makes no sense(some aren’t even adjectives)…and subject to change…

funny, happy, silly, crazy, serious, immature, chubby, sweet, myopic, fair, eccentric, klutz, careless, messed up, sad, depressed, blonde, dumb, messy, absent minded, in love, unimpressed, maternal, sick, intelligent, artsy, perfectionist, tardy, dunce, bland, unambitious, teacher, pink, ane, fat, thoughtful, loner, annoying, pragmatist, short, lazy, sleepy, workaholic, busy, fun, emotional, idealist, passionate, romantic, soppy, scary, scared, worried, la di da, diva, phat, old fashioned, liberal, huggable, kissable, naughty, helpful, sucker, lucky, sleepy, nuts, level headed, thrifty, unstable, drama queen, horny, slave, sister, bossy, talented, writer, skank, bitch, hopeless, has salt issues when it comes to cooking, sociable, shanil’s, sexy, bubbly, round, different eye colour, technologically challenged, daft, burgher, trying, impaitent, sympathetic, bored, garulous, self conscious, hungry, compassionate….

i’ll put the rest up later.